Today we are having a deep and vulnerable conversation about the pain of divorce, and the often unavoidable conflicts that can arise from time to time when co-parenting. Our guest today is the lovely and insightful Phoebe Cellitti. She is a dear kindred soul-sistah, a mother, wife, social-worker, teacher, and speaker. I am sure so many of you can relate to the stories Phoebe shares! Did something in this episode remind you of your own life? Please email me at [email protected]. I would love to expand this conversation with your input, and share your stories on the show!   In this episode: * The shame that arises from divorce. * The concept that healing is not a linear process. Phoebe's experience of letting ofr of the expectations that healing and releasing grief will be a linear process. *The upheaval of conflict even after times of peace. * The pain of an Ex getting with a new partner, and the feelings of shame and inadequacy. * Phoebe's pain and how it impacted her relationship with food. * The experience of receiving positive feedback from others during a time of starvation and horrible self-care, self-loathing, and pain. * The black and white cycle of starvation vs. complete indulgence * Phoebe's experience of surrender, and coming to a place of being ok with the way things are. Being ok with being misunderstood, or getting the outcome she ultimately desired. * The very real frustration of co-parenting and the feelings of being trapped and stuck. * Sometimes the path to Radical Self-Care is choosing our battles, and choosing the path of least resistance. Listening to our intuition. * Surrender and releasing control is NOT EASY. * Moving into health can be a releasing of addiction to suffering and drama. * Radical Self-Care is not indulgent. Radical Self-Care is doing the thing that is most nurturing & healthy for ourselves. *Phoebe's wonderful advice for women going through unavoidable conflict. * When others are telling us to "get over it", it is often about their own discomfort with our pain.