Welcome to Brunettes Who Bitch! This week, we’re giving the spotlight to the unsung (and often unhinged) heroes of the sports world: mascots. In this “Hear Me Out” list, we’re defending the mascots that don’t get enough credit—not just for their antics and in-game hype, but for their looks too. That’s right. Sometimes, it’s the weird ones, the cursed ones, or the unexpectedly adorable ones that win us over.

We’re talking about mascots who are chaotic in the best way, terrifying in a way we oddly respect, or just so uniquely designed that we had to give them their due. From Gritty’s gremlin energy to the Stanford Tree’s fever dream aesthetic, we’re building our case one mascot at a time.

It’s part defense, part roast, part beauty pageant—because sometimes, it’s what’s on the outside that counts.

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