Today, I want to share a cautionary tale.

A few days ago I said to my husband:

“Maybe we should shake things up this year. Do something crazy. Sell our house, move to Hawaii… SOMETHING BIG.”

He looked at me blankly. “What about our families?” he asked. “What about our friends? What about your business? Besides, I like it here. I like our life. We do big things in little ways all the time.”

And it hit me–I had yet again got sucked into the New Year, New You crap– “When-Then Syndrome.” 

I had been reading the inspirational memes on social media–people planning on moving to exotic locations, quitting toxic jobs, losing weight, getting in shape–and my Inner Monger was getting louder and louder. 

All of these promises of a new and perfect life were making me feel like I wasn’t enough–like I was missing out. 

I was getting drawn into comparing myself to all the people who were making BIG change and I was twisting it into a ‘you are not good enough’ mantra.

I was stuck in a cycle of comparisonitis.

I let that realization sink in for a bit: my instinct to make a big change or do something impulsive was really just a mental reflex to our New Year, New You culture.

But when I think about what I value most in my life–empathy, relationships, laughter, integrity, compassion–I can see that the life I lead is a reflection of those values. 

My nearest and dearest was right: I love our life.  

Yes, I wish we had more adventures. Yes, I wish we had fewer restrictions on our time. Yes, I wish this living intentionally, having self-compassion and empathy and showing up for life was a little easier. But overall, I love the messy imperfection that is my life. 

I love that I have a life based on my values, and when things get messy and confusing, I can come back to them and remind myself, yes, right now this is what I want for my life.

In today’s episode, I explore how values are the foundation of your life. How they are the guiding principles on which everything else builds. And how when we work through our anxiety to narrow our down our list of values, we can use them to find what is most important to us. 

Listen to the full episode to hear:

 

• How naming your values is one of the best ways to bring yourself back to what is most important 

• How when you can get honest with yourself and name your values, they will become the new standards of how you live your life
• How to narrow your values down to a list of 5 values that are unique to you
• How to let go of the guilt of not sharing someone else’

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