Our patrons have spoken and have thus decreed that we explain the convoluted plot and examine the tired tropes and potentially disturbing lore of The Nutcracker and the Four Realms, a Disney holiday flop. But this is a fantasy film, and we review these types of things, so we have taken up the challenge! So listen in to hear us piece together our critique of this film with gum and shoestring, about a girl who travels to another realm to find out what she needed was inside of her all along, a la Kung Fu Panda and The Narnia Chronicles. Perhaps we are the only ones who are uniquely suited to truly help you understand this film!

(music by Dexter Britain and Loyalty Freak Music, intro skit sounds and music obtained from Zapsplat.com)