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A two-pronged episode based on complimentary requests.  You could summarize this episode by asking the question:  why is it so hard to freakin be happy when you have good shit happening in your life?

What you'll hear:

• Part I:
• I just landed a contract I have spent the last two years dreaming about and I don't know how to process/deal with it. It feels like 'in the future' got here so quickly that I haven't caught up with myself yet and i keep swinging between "this isn't happening' 'they must have confused me with someone else" and "*confused static noises* -Helen
• What happens after your dreams come true? And why doesn't it feel BETTER?  1:45
• Storytime about my dreams coming true and how it sent me into a spiral 2:55
• Atlantic Center for the Arts Artist in Residency program
• How I ended up recording a 20 minute screaming rant while trying to "rehearse" Keep your eyes peeled on the Patreon if you'd like to see this rant, it was actually really good looking back on it now.  6:15
• "Pressure doesn't make good work, it makes good panic attacks."
• For the first time ever, I'm making Teeth public.  This is what I ended up making on that residency:  https://youtu.be/3LVHOqEUIn4  Content warning:  early loss.  8:46
• The Ego Gap:  why it can feel less than wonderful when you finally get what you want 10:55
• Part II
• A friend confided in me that she's avoiding doing her work even though when she actually does it, it makes her happy.  Why do we procrastinate on doing things we actually want to do?  12:30
• The Neverending Story:  sacred text  Auryn really called it.  13:51
• The real reason we procrastinate 15:30
• Brene Brown's quote about shame:    “If you put shame in a petri dish and cover it with judgment, silence, and secrecy, you’ve created the perfect environment for shame to grow until it makes its way into every corner and crevice of your life. If, on the other hand, you put shame in a petri dish and douse it with empathy, shame loses its power and begins to wither. Empathy creates a hostile environment for shame—an environment it can’t survive in, because shame needs you to believe you’re alone and it’s just you.”  Brené Brown, Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
• My take on why it's so hard for humans to be happy 20:00
• 
  

Don't go back to sleep.

xoRachel
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