In this three-part series, my husband and I get personal about the strategies we used to to help our three year old adjust to life with a baby sister.

1 of 3

Help Frame Their Perspectives on Changes

• Framing: we’re adding a new member to our family--part of our plan from the beginning

• Give lots of examples of siblings: 

  • aunts and uncles

  • friends with siblings

  • pets as siblings

• Answer questions in age-appropriate ways

Set expectations

• Read books about other kids adding new siblings (Daniel Tiger is great too!)

• Expose your child to friends’ babies to help set realistic expectations

Adjust routines

• Make major routine and setting changes far enough in advance to disassociate them (i.e., our new bedtime routine encouraging more independence)

  • Avoid blaming baby. (i.e., Mama can’t go down the slide because I’m uncomfortable--this is how my body is when I’m pregnant)

• Make sure kiddo is comfortable with another caregiver--i.e., Dad as primary

Reassure

• Tell lots of stories about when Big was a baby to help set expectations and let them know how much you treasured your time with them--reassurance

• Help them see their new role as a positive way to contribute to the family “Baby is so lucky to get to have such a considerate and funny big sister!”

• Communicate that no feelings are off-limits. Acknowledge range of feelings

  What other advice would you give to families preparing to add a new sibling? Share below.