The number 13 is historically unlucky so it makes sense that this episode starts with Alison telling on Dana to Oprah for misspellings and not understanding basic math. We also read some listener feedback and give a shout-out to our show’s mascot.

Episode 13 is dedicated exclusively to a segment in our show called Absolute Worst Therapy wherein we try to solve listener problems. Our first question leads to a discussion about appropriate bagel store attire and we try to understand if it’s ok to be objectified. Afterwards we try to fix one of the most difficult issues we face in society — a bad haircut.

Then we meet a man who is in love with two siblings but is forced to choose just one. I HATE WHEN THIS HAPPENS!!! We also once again discuss dildos and what you should do if you don’t have one in your immediate vicinity.

Finally, we answer a question about Jamaica and weed smoking and find the solution in a Selena Gomez lyric. And then Dana blows Alison’s mind by reasonably answering a question about perfume allergies.

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255