This week, AJ and AJ get honest about advocating for your own needs in relationships. “J” unpacks how hard it has been to ask for help — even from her husband of 18 years. From lying sick on the floor but still struggling to say “I need you,” she recognizes the codependent habit of keeping score: doing good deeds in the quiet hope that someone will notice and reciprocate without being asked.

"J" connected deeply with the main character in Love, Theoretically — someone who twists herself into whatever shape the person in front of her wants. J shares how she recognized that pattern in herself, how she’s been breaking it, and what it looks like now to speak up in the moment instead of silently keeping tabs.

“A“ talks about how her ex’s addictions chipped away at her confidence until she felt completely hideous and unwanted. But one drive, one album (AM), and one song (“Arabella”) flipped the switch. She had a break through. She was not that old! She was hot! She was not the problem. And it was time to get busy.