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While assumptions may be at the root cause of most arguments, often the trigger for an argument starting is when one party becomes defensive. When they’re accused of something, they will lash out with their own accusation about you. Then the conversation gets moved away from the original issue about them and on to you. If you then become defensive about their accusation, then the conversation devolves into an argument and you never resolve the original issue. This episode talks about communication tools you can use to deal effectively with defensiveness.