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The Two Mikes don't lose their heads or any other parts, but still enjoy Brian Evenson's Last Days.  The hero gets out mostly intact but the Mikes will remain Zeroes thank you very much.

Cocktail Time! 🍸

The Self-Cauterizer

Get a pint beer glass and fill half way with a dark beer like a Stout or a Porter.  Take 150 Proof Rum and float on the top by pouring on the back of the spoon. Ignite the rum, at your own peril, and when tired of the fire, extinguish by filling up the rest of pint glass with more dark beer.

Yes, this is a lazy drink. Chin Chin.