At the beginning of her third Rikers diary, the Feloni$t opens up about the crushing isolation of prison life — the abandonment, the longing for family, and the mental battles that make hope feel fragile. In this raw reflection, she confronts despair that cuts deeper than fear, the ache of letting go, and the desperate search for signs that she’s not alone. It’s a stark look at survival, mental health, and the human need for connection in the darkest moments.