How we tend to praise and reward our children is completely at odds with what the science shows us as being most effective.

Our society tends to praise children's competence-based achievements, instead of character-based strength that got them there. Does this sound like you?

What's the difference between competence and character-based praise, and why does it matter which we use?

Competence is easy to spot, and it's tempting to always praise it when we see it, thinking that's the right thing to do. But when you balance it with recognising character, it is hugely beneficial to your child's self-esteem.