I'm Joe, this is BOLD. This week I planned a romantic birthday for Máire. Not a spa day or a European day-trip. Instead, she drags me to the Dublin Criminal Courts of Justice to spectate the high profile Richard Satchwell murder trial. It wasa terrible experience: frazzled barristers, no transcripts, and the judge baffled with the prosecution. I’m paranoid the jury’ll recognize me and I'll cause a mistrial.

Then, we slog through dull tours at Collins Barracks and Kilmainham Jail acting the tourist again. Dinner at FX Buckley’s is an expensive dissapointment. Overdone steak, prawns with the head on, And Oysters that tasted like... Oysters. I spar with the waiter, skip the tip. But we salvage the night at the Stag’s Head with Guinness and a ukulele jam... until the Americans showed up.