It was a dark and stormy night, when your loyal hosts sat down to discuss a film that...well. It was something. Through sparse and disjointed plot, effects galore and spectacular, and a love interest straight out of novels we would have written in middle school, we bring to you a story of media not objectively good nor groundbreaking, but worthwhile just the same.

Talking points: Spectacle over story; how to know someone is a villain by their economic views; if bees are the most trustworthy insects; how turning the camp up to eleven is a good thing; you are greater than the sum of your genes; a five minute Christopher Nolan roast; sometimes it's just not that deep; and, hey, you don't need a reason to like things.