JAACAAAAAAAAB! Get those earphones in and get yourselves medieval – except for the earphones – because this week the Pauls lurch out of their opium hazes just long enough to lead an unlikely burden across an unbearable distance. That's right, we're in all kinds of east with Nick Powell's Chinese movie Outcast!

Featuring: shifting the Damon, the various ages of Boyden Manstensen, Benedict Wong?, a show of real British unity and meeting your boss's eye after your sexy video.