In this engaging conversation, Dr. Angelica Shiels discusses her journey as a psychologist sharing powerful insights on relationships, attachment theory, and the importance of emotional attunement. Drawing from her unique background—including time spent working in maximum security prisons—Dr. Shiels explores how trauma, parenting, and personality styles shape the way we connect with others. Dr. Shiels offers practical wisdom for parents, educators, and partners navigating emotional regulation, self-awareness, and connection.

Top Takeaways:

• Why attachment theory is crucial for understanding emotions.

• How trauma and personality styles impact connection.

• Emotional attunement as a parenting and partnership superpower.

• The surprising lessons Dr. Shiels learned in maximum-security prisons.

• Systems-level solutions to school violence and generational trauma.
  

Chapters:

00:00 – Meet Dr. Shiels

05:50 – Attachment Theory Basics

09:13 – Why Attunement Matters

14:57 – Sensitive vs. Rigid Personalities

21:05 – Lessons from Prison Psychology

37:58 – Mentorship & Prevention

52:42 – Emotional Self-Awareness

Connect with Dr. Angelica Shiels:

Instagram 

Tiktok

Website:https://marylandfamilypsychology.com/

Let’s Connect: If something in this episode resonated with you or you have questions about coaching, I’d love to connect.

Instagram:@evelynmarley

Email: [email protected]

Website: www.evelynmarleycoaching.com

Books by Dr. Angelica Shields:

• Patterns of Love – A deep dive into attachment styles, stress responses, and parenting strategies. Available on Amazon
  

• Safety Then Connection – A practical workbook with exercises to help understand core beliefs and build emotional safety in relationships.

  
  

Key Theories & Frameworks:

• Attachment Theory – Includes avoidant, anxious, and disorganized (aka fearful-avoidant) styles.

• The Attunement Method – Dr. Shields’ signature approach for healing relationships by first creating nervous system safety.

• “Hide it” vs. “Expose it” Stress Responses – Her original framework explaining how people react to emotional distress.

• Core Beliefs & Externalizing Beliefs – A tool to track your internal thought patterns in relationships (found in her workbook).

• Safety Orientation – Are you safety-driven by your internal instincts or external guidance?

• Nature vs. Nurture Theory – How inherent sensitivity or rigidity shapes attachment styles.

Referenced Therapy Models:

• Gottman Method – Known for concepts like stonewalling and emotional bids.

• Imago Relationship Therapy – A couples therapy model focused on dialogue and childhood wounds.

Research Highlight:

• The Violence Project – A study-based initiative researching school violence and generational trauma. More info at theviolenceproject.org
  

Support & Prevention Programs:

• Big Brothers Big Sisters – Mentorship program proven to positively shift at-risk youth trajectories. Learn more
  

• Trauma-Informed School Coaching (idea discussed) – A proposed model to support kids in school through trained mentors/coaches.

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Keywords: relationships, attunement, attachment theory, parenting, psychology, social media, emotional intelligence, personal development, mental health, couples therapy, trauma, crime, mentorship, emotional attunement, prevention, mental health, generational trauma

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