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Episode 31: Time to Think
Have you ever been so frustrated at work or life and wanted to scream - “I don’t even have time to think!?!?” We have! Today we experiment with a simple yet not so easy (and hardly ever practiced) methodology of creating a Thinking Environment, based off of Nancy Kline’s research highlighted in her “Time to Think” book series. So the methodology can be summarized as: if you really want to do your best thinking and build your muscle to think for yourself well, then find a Thinking Partner. The Thinking Partner’s job is to listen well by providing a safe space for you to think out loud. The Thinking Partner, or Listener has a very hard job - they must keep their eyes on the Thinker and be as still and quiet as possible. The Listener only prompts the Thinker, as needed, to continue with a question like, “and what more?” or “and what else?” . . . This is a perfect example of sounds easy/does hard. I heard a few weeks ago that LISTEN and SILENT have the same letters - wow - remember it! If you want to be a good Listener you must be silent. Mute yourself if you have to. Respect the other person with your silence so they can hear their thoughts without distraction from your voice, or another question you want to assault them with, or your advice - ugh! The big secret is, NO ONE really wants advice. Our human brains do not want commands - and you have not, nor will you ever experience that other person’s life. So don’t pretend that your experience can help them with their unique experience. That’s why our brains thrive on questions. They love to explore, discover and create - create their own ideas, their own experiments to move forward, and discover their own life lessons bottled up inside. So, offer 5 minutes of a Thinking Environment to someone you know and see how it goes. Ask someone to partner with you as a Listener and see what comes up. If nothing else, you will be able to say, I had 5 minutes to think today! Woo hoo! If you really want a challenge as someone younger if they would like to think out loud for 5 - oh the lessons you will learn . . .
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By Gwen Sandefur and Kate MariebHave you ever been so frustrated at work or life and wanted to scream - “I don’t even have time to think!?!?” We have! Today we experiment with a simple yet not so easy (and hardly ever practiced) methodology of creating a Thinking Environment, based off of Nancy Kline’s research highlighted in her “Time to Think” book series. So the methodology can be summarized as: if you really want to do your best thinking and build your muscle to think for yourself well, then find a Thinking Partner. The Thinking Partner’s job is to listen well by providing a safe space for you to think out loud. The Thinking Partner, or Listener has a very hard job - they must keep their eyes on the Thinker and be as still and quiet as possible. The Listener only prompts the Thinker, as needed, to continue with a question like, “and what more?” or “and what else?” . . . This is a perfect example of sounds easy/does hard. I heard a few weeks ago that LISTEN and SILENT have the same letters - wow - remember it! If you want to be a good Listener you must be silent. Mute yourself if you have to. Respect the other person with your silence so they can hear their thoughts without distraction from your voice, or another question you want to assault them with, or your advice - ugh! The big secret is, NO ONE really wants advice. Our human brains do not want commands - and you have not, nor will you ever experience that other person’s life. So don’t pretend that your experience can help them with their unique experience. That’s why our brains thrive on questions. They love to explore, discover and create - create their own ideas, their own experiments to move forward, and discover their own life lessons bottled up inside. So, offer 5 minutes of a Thinking Environment to someone you know and see how it goes. Ask someone to partner with you as a Listener and see what comes up. If nothing else, you will be able to say, I had 5 minutes to think today! Woo hoo! If you really want a challenge as someone younger if they would like to think out loud for 5 - oh the lessons you will learn . . .