Put on your tin foil Pooh Shiesty, because the conspiracies are on 10 in this week’s episode of #RANTSWITHANTDAMNiT. ANT opens by planning his own funeral like it’s a red-carpet event, proving that even mortality can’t escape his sense of humor. From there, the rabbit hole goes nuclear — Tom Brady’s cloning his dead dog (because apparently grief has a budget), Erika Kirk’s lustful admiration for VP JD Vance gives new meaning to “political thirst,” and the infamous Brick Girl, Roda Osman, learns that viral fame has consequences. Floyd Mayweather might’ve sold more than a fight this time, Jake Paul cancels his bout with Tank Davis in cryptic influencer fashion, and Laila Ali says “no” to Clarissa Shields in a decision that shook the sport. Meanwhile, Wanda Sykes draws a cultural line in the sand, pledging to always hire a Black woman over a Black man — and Maino reminds everyone that loyalty still trumps PR. Death, dogs, and delusion — just another week in America’s circus of “love and politricks.”

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