Strap in, you filthy animals! This week we’re breaking down the NFL Draft’s hottest edge rushers the Washington Commanders might snag to finally crush some skulls. Then, we’re tackling the Eagles’ tush push; will the NFL owners ban this cheeky play at their 2025 meetings, or are they just salty they can’t squat like Jalen? Meanwhile, the UFL kicked off Week 1 with the DC Defenders stomping Birmingham into next Tuesday, but the real buzz is the Yankees’ new ‘orpedo bat; a juiced-up lumber rocket that blasted a shit-ton of homers and runs. Is it a genius hack or a lame cheat? We’re diving deep into the controversy, so grab a whiskey, lock the bedroom door, and let’s get it.