The Luella Jonk Show

Episode #41: The Self-Help Trap


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In this episode, I’m unpacking why chasing after emotional validation can sometimes do more harm than good. While feeling understood is important, constantly seeking reassurance can keep you in a cycle of dependence rather than growth.

I'll walk you through:

✅ Why relying too much on validation can weaken your sense of self

✅ The difference between healthy support and emotional crutches

✅ How to build confidence without needing constant affirmation

✅ Why internal stability matters more than external approval

✅ Practical steps to shift from seeking validation to self-trust

Whether you're struggling with relationship insecurities, feeling unheard, or just relying too much on others to feel okay, this episode offers a perspective shift that could make all the difference. True confidence doesn’t come from getting endless reassurance—it comes from knowing you don’t always need it.

🔔 And as always, while independence is key, meaningful connections and the right support system can help you grow in ways you can't always do alone.

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The Luella Jonk ShowBy Dr. Luella Jonk, PhD

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