LISTEN UP, COWARDS: We start a discussion of food and Rodney Dangerfield where all discussions of these things start: Michael Jordan. Small foods AHOY! Peanut M&Ms, crabbies, bacon-wrapped anything - we love small foods baby! Word to the wise: establish a relationship with caterers at a catered event and make sure they bring you the goods. Also if you're still playing beer pong with beer in the cups you're a craven fool. We recount a drunken Joe story.

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