Online comments hailed Melissa McCarthy's sixth turn hosting on December 6, 2025 as comic genius, but our collective take was more mixed. We discuss Pentagon Press Conference Cold Open and Jost's growing confidence as a performer as well as A Helping Hand, which showcased McCarthy's dramatic range. We focus on Free Sample to discuss fat humor, embodiment, loneliness, and attachment theory. Readings and resources include theoretical work regarding fatness and loneliness, as well as conversations on Harlow's psychologically deprived monkeys.