What if everything therapists have told you about saving your marriage is completely backwards? 

Join Matt and Dr. Bruce Chalmer as they challenge everything you thought you knew about relationships and take a deep dive into what it really takes to cultivate genuine intimacy, stability, and the kind of authentic connection that carries couples through life's most brutal storms. 

You'll walk away with a deeper understanding of why communication might not be the real problem, how stability can sometimes work against you, and overcoming infidelity.

Dr. Chalmer's counterintuitive approach isn’t what you’ll find in typical relationship advice books. Whether you're navigating serious betrayal or simply feeling disconnected, this conversation offers the kind of revolutionary perspective that can transform your relationship pain into power.

0:00 Introduction

5:42 Forgiveness as an inside job

11:15 Communication isn't the core issue

16:19 Kindness, faith, and not panicking

21:47 The importance of kindness in relationships

27:15 Why great sex lives are uncommon

31:42 Betrayal can lead to relationship growth

33:53 First steps after discovering betrayal

36:50 Key takeaways on marriage and relationships

Resources Mentioned:

📚Dr. Bruce Chalmer's books:

 "Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Couples Lose Intimacy and How to Get It Back"

  "It's Not About Communication: Why Everything You Know About Couples Therapy Is Wrong"

🌐Dr. Bruce Chalmer's website: 

https://brucechalmer.com

"Couples Therapy in Seven Words" podcast by Dr. Bruce Chalmer and Judy Alexander:

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/couples-therapy-in-seven-words/id1517231158

About the Guest:

Dr. Bruce Chalmer is a psychologist and couples therapist with over 30 years of experience helping couples navigate the complexities of relationships. He is the author of multiple books challenging conventional wisdom about marriage and therapy, including "It's Not About Communication: Why Everything You Know About Couples Therapy Is Wrong." Dr. Chalmer co-hosts the "Couples Therapy in Seven Words" podcast and offers coaching services to help couples reignite intimacy and overcome challenges in their relationships.