There's an expression people use to bring other people down. The expression is "I know you don't want to hear this". This expression makes me cringe. These words should never be used against anyone, especially friends. Explain that the expression is not helpful and is a harmful form of pessimism. Try not to analyze their pessimism. This is about saying the wrong thing the wrong way.  Respect their feelings while your pleas to change fall in deaf ears. Thanks for visiting.