F53-063: Regret - How Is It Affecting Your Business and Your Life?

Show Summary: Today's show is about REGRET, inspired from a short Facebook video I saw a couple of days ago going around where he discussed regrets and it showed an elderly person on their deathbed and talked about what they regretted. Unanimously, older people will tell you that things they wish they could go back and change and had regrets about were not playing all in, not going all in, following their dreams, doing their passions, those types of things. So it got me thinking, and I've thought about this a lot, particularly as I'd turn 40, maybe it's a midlife crisis (that's what my wife would say and maybe some of my friends). Truthfully, I really don't have probably any or many regrets, maybe none at all. Where I'm at today is because of the decisions I made along the path of life. I have a very blessed life so I can't really turn my nose up to that. But if you take regrets and say, "Is my next decision based on a regret or something that I would want to do?" So I try to flip it. I don't like the word "regret" necessarily but I think it's powerful and I think it works. But I like to think of it as... If I were to look at myself five years from now, would I be happy with that decision or would I have made a different decision? So I use that filter to go through some of the things I do or where I commit my time to or where I put my energy and focus to. It really changes how you proceed and a small example of that is professional success. You climb the corporate ladder and you have a lot of "success" on the corporate level or a normal job. Go to school. Go to college. Graduate. Find a job. Get better. Get promoted. Have two and half kids, whatever the number is.   Aligning Your Decisions with Your True Values I heard this great line at an intensive I was at: "You climb the ladder of success only to realize your ladder is leaned up against the wrong building." You can call that regret. You can call that, "I didn't know any better." But at a certain point in time and it happens to all of us I believe. You get to where you're aware of your decisions and the impact that will have on your future and on your family's future and on your well-being. Then you ask yourself, "Holy crap! Should I be doing this in the first place? Is this right for me? Is this really aligned with my true values?” And when you're at a point where you're making decisions like that and you're projecting it into the future, your future self, that's really when you start to get this concept of regret that resonates deep inside of you. It doesn't turn into regret at that point because you're aware of it. It turns into this fear or disappointment because you're not living what you know is the right thing for you. This is not only a professional thing but it's also with your health, your relationships with family members, your fitness and exercise. Regret as a Blessing If we're at that spot where we are taking our thoughts and we’re questioning what we're doing because we're projecting what it's going to do in our life 5-10 years from now, our kids, our legacy, here’s an exercise: Consider this a blessing. I've been enlightened with a notion that I can think about what I'm going to do today and how it's going to affect my life going forward. That is a gift and a blessing. A lot of people don't have that option or they don't have that vision. When you have that thought or awakening, my hope for myself and for everyone else is this: Make a decision based on what's right for you and your family and your legacy going forward so that 2, 3, 5 years from now, you don't look back and have that regret, thinking I should have done this differently. Whether it's your job, training, career path, smoking, diet, not going to the doctor to take care of a lump on your back, whatever that looks like for you, my hope for you and for me is the intestinal fortitude to stand up for it. Think about it and do what's right. I think deep down inside we all know what that is. Regret is a very real thing and hopefully it's a blessing for all of us.   Books, People, & Resources: I'm researching former professional athletes and how they transition from being an athlete or a new lead athlete into the "real world." I'm interested in hearing about their struggles, their challenges, roadblocks, successes, and everything in between. Sports has always been a big part of my life. I love them. I have a special interest in athletes and specifically the ones that have competed at the highest levels. Do you know anyone like that? If so, I'd love to hear from them or maybe it's even you. Shoot me an email at [email protected].