Festivals used to be chaos — mud, sweat, riffs, and rebellion. Now they’re cosplay carnivals where you pay triple just to be VIP cattle behind a velvet rope. In this episode of The Macabre Coven, Xavi rips into the corporate corpse of modern festivals: overpriced piss-water beer, hashtaglobotomized influencers, and rebellion neutered by sponsorship deals. Expect grotesque humor, Venomous Sin expressions, and the kind of verbal crucifixion that makes you laugh while it guts you.