From the blog www.blissanddrumming.com, this piece http://blissanddrumming.com/2017/10/finding-compassion-behind-drumkit/ is read by Clementine. She also references www.awakeningthetrueself.com.

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What is really interesting is how much easier it is to be compassionate to others than it is to oneself. On the stage, when I fall out of the moment, what is there is a berating voice, warning of upcoming potential disasters, or negative thoughts of defeat. I’ve always felt that any harsh criticism of my playing could never be as wounding as the things I hear in my head. Anything hurtful you can say about my playing can never be worse than what I’ve heard already, upstairs.

I know by now that these thoughts are my ego, trying to protect me from disaster. I know that it’s that deep layer of shame at the bottom of my personality, nagging me to give up before I begin. I’m grateful that my years of meditation have clued me in to these patterns and have given me a way to step back from them, observe them and let them dissolve.