Today I learned that I should focus on being fair more than being liked. I was at my schools bookstore hoping to return a book I had rented for the semester. I didn’t know whether or not I would pass the class but I wanted to make sure I avoided the $185 fee, had I not return the book. I handed the book to the guy behind the counter. He took a look at it and said he needed to show the manager because their appeared to be water damage. I calmly said okay because the book seemed fine to me. The manager came out and presented my book with a ripped spine and said that they could not accept my return. I immediately refused that the damage of the book’s spine was my own fault because it wasn’t. She said okay but then said she could not accept my book because of the water damage. I was angry because this meant that I had to pay $185 for the book on top of the $125 I spent renting the book. I argue with lady about how obsurd the circumstances where but she didn’t budge. Even though water damage was minimal. I said I would weigh other options and took the book with me. After thinking about the situation I had to accept that the water was my fault so I had to buy the book. I reasoned that I could just sell the book online and recoup some of my money. But the ripped spine was not my fault so they would have to fix that. After returning the next morning I debated my case persistently. I did so respectfully, tactfully, but in a way where it wasn’t about me or her it was about what is right and what is wrong. Eventually the lady took the book from me and returned, stating that she would just write it off. I said thank you and left. ‘Focus I’m being fair more than being right’ means to do what I think is honestly the right thing. It means seperating my feelings for the other person. It means disregard if whether or not the person will like me or not afterwards. I like this idea because it encourages people to rely on you. Putting this idea into practice makes one trustworthy. Putting this idea into practice makes it easy for people to deal with you because they know if they play fair you will play fair. This idea does require extra effort to apply. A lot of things aren’t black and white. A lot of things need to be seen from both sides. One has to stop and think about what is the fair thing to do. One also has to be prepared to be the bad guy to illustrate a point, to discipline poor behavior. One also has to accept that the majority won’t favor. People forget that actions have consequences when you remind them of that they get angry at you. One thing to note about this idea is that sometimes you have to apply sympathy. Sometimes a person does the wrong thing. The option to leave them out in the cold is tempting it would be best to remember when you were in their shoes. When you made the same mistakes. Your not doing this so that they like you, your doing it because if the roles were reversed you would want to be shown mercy. Focus on being fair than being liked it’s freeing and a better long term approach to dealing with people.