Austin Anderson unpacks the chaos of Midwest winter, from -30° mornings to potbelly pigs with a taste for blood. He tells stories from his camper days—frozen pipes, showering with milk jugs, and near-death by diesel heater—before spiraling into a donut-fueled existential crisis, his son’s fat jokes, and a late-night rant about Elon Musk’s trillion-dollar robot army and the “Trans Apocalypse.” It’s a cozy blizzard of stories about survival, stupidity, and staying warm when life keeps throwing snowballs at your face.

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