Happy Birthday to Easter… aka Zombie Jesus Day™ (respectfully… kinda). Lauren has a headache (shocking, groundbreaking, never before seen), the technology is once again fighting for its life, and her brain has decided to simply… not participate today. Thoughts? Gone. Memories? Deleted. Vibes? Questionable.

We are STILL boo’d up with HauntFest (as we should be 💅), and Lauren is wearing her Pink Mermaid 7Brew shirt because she hasn’t been in a while and is emotionally spiraling about it. This is what we call coping.

Meanwhile, Mischa is going through it because Courtney had the AUDACITY to smell like other dogs. Betrayal. Absolute betrayal. She is clingy, offended, and demanding justice (and snacks). The cats? Oh, they are screaming. Why? Because doors are closed. And apparently that is a crime punishable by death in this household.

Once we manage to wrestle control of the chaos (barely), we dive into the brutal and deeply unsettling Clutter family murders—except Lauren did this research so long ago that now we are all learning together in real time. Love that for us. Expect confusion, shock, and at least one moment where Lauren goes, “wait…WHAT??” like she didn’t literally write this herself.

And because we clearly hate peace, we also spiral into the case of Charles Starkweather—a teenage killing spree, bad decisions, and enough chaos to make you question literally everything about humanity.

So buckle up. It’s unhinged. It’s educational (technically). It’s chaotic as hell. And somehow, we do manage to talk about murder in between screaming animals, technical issues, and Lauren’s declining will to function.

Welcome to the episode. You’re stuck with us now.