Lately, I have directed my comedic, well I think so at least, writings towards The Jizz Stain and Krusti Kristi the Kum Kovered Klown but I would like us to remember one insane crazy bitch who is so fucking dumb she asked her history teacher if the footage they were watching in class, with the little H in the bottom left hand corner, was infact, "real" recordings of ..... Drum roll.... The fucking Civil War. Her teacher said nothing except he gave Tessa back her helmet, that is indicative of what mentally retarded people wear and then he finished his Diet Coke from a Subway cup that smelled mildly like whiskey than he grabbed a rope, walked into the hallway and hung himself because he clearly was a terrible teacher. So terrible, that Dumb cunt Tessa believed that we had not only war videographes back then but also color video cameras and all the necessary AV equipment. Fucking..... Retard..... Do you all remember Garbages Pale Kids cards? Well,t Tessas baby pics were used as the primer for the entire line. Her parents sent her photos to Gerber but they couldn't use them at all, because herbphots inspired Satan to appear and resulted in several kids commiting suicide. Hence the Poltergeist movie series Anyways, so Gerber partnered with Mattel and used Tessa's pictures to create the first ever Terrible Tessa the Trashy Toddler Thrashing Through Just Shit and Vomit and Piss and Diarrhea. That's Tessa in a shitshell for you. Just awful. Smells of feces, looks like shit, obviously, and is dumber than a bag full of dof shit that I scooped up at the dog park. Hey Tessa, oh and my college roommate freshman year at Cal Poly, Matthew Oatman, my supposed friend for several years, how often did you all fuck behind my back as a way to make me look stupid "according to Matt". His plan was to fuck my GF Tessa without me knowing and make me look stupid to everyone that knew. An inside joke that everyone knew but I didn't. Until not too recently. Matt Oatman, you're an abomination of a human being. They say living well is the best revenge. I will have everything and you will be getting raped and fucked everyday for the rest of your life in prison. That doesn't sound like living well does it Matt. I will destroy you for what you did. Suicide would be a better choice for your future compared to what I will ensure happens to you. Is that clear? I hope so. Tessa you know what is in store for you. Basically, the same. You all could be Pen Pals. How cute. Fuck you both. I do hope suicide is in your future, both of you, truly. Thanks for being just such amazing friends and wife. Go fuck yourselves.