God calls Sam, the prophet, but Sam is a call screener. When he finally picks up, God delivers a pretty harsh multi-generation curse to pass on to Eli. In other news, the Arc gets stolen by some uncircumcised philistines, and God is still pretty intense about not touching his box. But he gets even MORE intense about not being chosen by the humans to be their King. Find out what happens when you steal the Arc, and who will take over Pride Rock.

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