In this heartfelt episode of Empowered & Out, Coach Jon sits down with Kara Zajac, freelance writer, chiropractor, entrepreneur, musician, and author of The Significance of Curly Hair: A Loving Memoir of Life and Loss.

Kara’s memoir takes place during the emotionally loaded week of her grandmother’s funeral — a week that cracked open grief, memory, identity, family history, and the truths we sometimes do not understand until much later in life. Together, Jon and Kara explore what grief teaches us, how family stories shape who we become, and why healing often begins when we let ourselves feel instead of forcing ourselves to “move on.”

This conversation also opens up powerful reflections on queer identity, motherhood, chosen family, authenticity, and the realization that there is no single “right” way to build a life. Kara shares how losing her grandmother helped her challenge old beliefs about family, marriage, motherhood, and what it means to live honestly.

If you have ever carried grief, questioned the life you are “supposed” to live, or wondered how to honor someone you miss without losing yourself, this episode will meet you with tenderness, humor, and truth.

Chapters

00:00 — Welcome to Empowered & Out
02:22 — Meet Kara Zajac
02:25 — Energy check-in
04:29 — Why Kara’s memoir takes place during the week of her grandmother’s funeral
06:02 — The moment grief began changing her
08:40 — What Kara wishes more people understood about grief
09:37 — Coach Jon reflects on grief and losing his father
11:34 — Seeing family members as whole people
13:17 — Learning new stories after loss
15:03 — Understanding her grandmother beyond the role of “grandmother”
16:09 — Being gay, married, a mother, and fully yourself
17:45 — Letting go of the belief that there is only one way to live
21:41 — What to say to someone who feels forced to choose one version of life
23:36 — Staying authentic when life gets loud
24:54 — Being out in a small rural community
27:44 — How authenticity builds trust
30:53 — A powerful neighborhood moment about queer family and visibility
32:38 — How grief shifted Kara’s view of motherhood
34:30 — What motherhood taught Kara about love
37:11 — Releasing the belief that children “need” one specific family structure
40:21 — Raising children with openness and love
43:17 — How Kara wants her daughter to define family
46:24 — Inclusive churches, Pride, and belonging
49:09 — The dollhouse story
51:14 — The “dollhouse moments” we miss in our own lives
52:45 — Truth, memory, and family stories
55:49 — Giving grace to complicated family histories
57:25 — What Kara hopes readers take away about grief
58:06 — Rapid fire questions
1:00:01 — Kara’s actionable tip for listeners
1:00:37 — Closing reflections and CTA

If this episode stirred something in you — maybe around grief, family, identity, confidence, or the version of your life you are ready to stop hiding — I invite you to book a free discovery call with me.

At Empowered & Out Coaching, I help professionals rebuild confidence, reconnect with purpose, and make career and life choices that support both success and wellbeing.

Book your free call here:  linktr.ee/empoweredandout 

And if this conversation moved you, share it with someone who needs a reminder that grief does not have to be fixed all at once — and that there is more than one way to build a beautiful life.