Every year, Mother’s Day came and went. Cards signed with loving words, beautiful flowers arraigned in vases and delicious brunches enjoyed. But this year is different. This year I am different.

Over the last six months, I've been through a surprisingly intense process of shedding protective layers I didn’t even realize I was still wearing. For years, I used these protective layers to shield my heart, inhibiting myself from fully and freely expressing love and from receiving it. But now, something real has shifted inside of me. I have mindfully chosen to show up, my heart wide open. I definitely feel it and I know others do also. Especially my mom, Phyllis Passink Cohen.

Growing up, I kept my inner world hidden from her and everyone else. I became a master at pretending to be fine, faking it behind a wall of independence, arrogance and self-protection. But over the past few years and especially through the challenges I faced over the last 6 months, that resistant shame-based veil has slowly melted away. The relationship between my mom and I has become deeply connected, rooted in love, being honest, authentic, vulnerable, open and real with each other.

Throughout my life, my amazing mom was always there for me, when I allowed her to be. Her heart was open, if I allowed myself to receive it. She was willing to listen, if I had been willing to share. Even in my darkest seasons, I knew she was there… just waiting. And when I hit my rock bottom, it was her that became the rock at my bottom.

My mom’s life hasn’t been easy. She’s carries deep wounds from her childhood. With grace and grit, she has survived the tragic loss of her young son, the passing of her husband from cancer, and lately watching her oldest son struggle through pulmonary fibrosis and a lung transplant. Yet she has always been the pillar of our family. Her strength shows up with open arms, wise wisdom, and a fierce love reflected in how she puts others first and only wants the best for her children, grandchildren, and her many great-grands.

Life has its own rhythm, and the storms I sailed through recently, became the bridge for me to cross. For the first time, I really let her in. I finally let myself be seen by her. I shared what was happening inside me, raw, honest, unfiltered. And there she was, just like always, listening with empathy, compassion… and yes, a little loving lecture. That’s just how she rolls. Love you, Mom.

Today, I want to honor my mom. To acknowledge her giving spirit, her kind heart, her unwavering strength, and her grace. When you visit her, she greets you with a smile, a warm hug and when you leave she will wish you to “have a pretty day.” While you are in her home, she’ll make sure you’re fed and send you home with a bag of leftovers. Even with two hip replacements and a few other health hurdles along the way, she’s still reading he beloved books, working on her treasured puzzles, and keeping her mind sharp with online card games.

Mom, thank you for being there without judgment, for loving me through the dark times in my life, and for always showing me how to live with determination, kindness and courage.

I am so proud to be your son.

I love you!

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!

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