10-17-06 It's not a lecture, it's a gift. The Cheapo Company gave me a Dodge Neon and the President asked me to emblazon on his employees' chests a mantra. Bumping is good. This is not about me. A gift from yourself is the best gift of all, because it came from God. Like the Tinman. I'd put God inside me. (show interrupted by a trip to Taco Bell) I got a postcard from someone in my family describing the emotional impact of my non-presence. I've been to this Taco Bell before. My face and name are known. Is there a Creep Festival? They look like they want to stab me in the cheek and steel my tires and sell the rubber. This is not a gift session, it's a lecture. When you threaten a litigation it scares people. More creepy people. is this a homeless convention? Delilah is a hoot and has a son with Polio. Children are not born with diseases that their mothers didn't give them. That woman did that to her child. More scary people. People with ugly faces should not have children. There should be a standard. I am a celebrity but sometimes I just want people to go away, especially people with big noses.

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Produced by Mark Baratelli