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He Looks Like He's About to Give Birth
Looks Like He’s About to Give Birth
Dispatched & Dysfunctional – Because sometimes the worst calls make the best stories.
🚑 A new guy, first hitch offshore. GI symptoms on arrival. His supervisor thought he was faking it.
He wasn’t.
By the time I found him, his belly was tight, distended, and he could barely breathe. IV fluids. Antibiotics. Foley. Medevac launched. Surgeons later removed two feet of necrotic bowel — and told him he was six hours from rupture.
This is what it looks like when you trust your gut — and it’s right. You don’t always get a win out here. But this time, I did. And yeah… I’m proud of that.
⚠️ CONTENT WARNING: Offshore medical emergency, abdominal trauma, graphic medical discussion, and dark humor. Listener discretion advised.
Why It Matters:
Because out here, hesitation kills. Offshore medicine doesn’t come with backup around the corner — when you’re wrong, the patient pays the price. Trusting your gut isn’t just instinct, it’s survival. And sometimes, getting it right means someone gets to go home who otherwise wouldn’t.
🧠 Need support?
Text or call 988 or visit 988lifeline.org
💬 “I’d rather hear your story than read your eulogy.”
📬 Want to share your story?
Visit critical-run.com or message us on Facebook: Dispatched and Dysfunctional
🧠 Need support right now? Call or text 988 or visit 988lifeline.org. You’re not alone — not in this job, not in this fight.
📱 Follow us on Facebook: Dispatched and Dysfunctional
🌐 Visit: www.critical-run.com to connect, share your story, or just vent
🎤 Got a call that changed you? Submit your story — we’ll carry it with care (and maybe a little dark humor).
⚠️ Disclaimer: This podcast contains graphic content, emotional storytelling, and dark humor based on real-life EMS and first responder experiences. Listener discretion is advised.
Any medical discussion is personal opinion, not medical advice. Always follow your local protocols, medical direction, and training guidelines.
This podcast isn’t about fairy tales. It’s about real calls, real chaos, and the medics who survive both.
Dispatched & Dysfunctional — because sometimes the worst calls… make the best stories.
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By Chris StocktonLooks Like He’s About to Give Birth
Dispatched & Dysfunctional – Because sometimes the worst calls make the best stories.
🚑 A new guy, first hitch offshore. GI symptoms on arrival. His supervisor thought he was faking it.
He wasn’t.
By the time I found him, his belly was tight, distended, and he could barely breathe. IV fluids. Antibiotics. Foley. Medevac launched. Surgeons later removed two feet of necrotic bowel — and told him he was six hours from rupture.
This is what it looks like when you trust your gut — and it’s right. You don’t always get a win out here. But this time, I did. And yeah… I’m proud of that.
⚠️ CONTENT WARNING: Offshore medical emergency, abdominal trauma, graphic medical discussion, and dark humor. Listener discretion advised.
Why It Matters:
Because out here, hesitation kills. Offshore medicine doesn’t come with backup around the corner — when you’re wrong, the patient pays the price. Trusting your gut isn’t just instinct, it’s survival. And sometimes, getting it right means someone gets to go home who otherwise wouldn’t.
🧠 Need support?
Text or call 988 or visit 988lifeline.org
💬 “I’d rather hear your story than read your eulogy.”
📬 Want to share your story?
Visit critical-run.com or message us on Facebook: Dispatched and Dysfunctional
🧠 Need support right now? Call or text 988 or visit 988lifeline.org. You’re not alone — not in this job, not in this fight.
📱 Follow us on Facebook: Dispatched and Dysfunctional
🌐 Visit: www.critical-run.com to connect, share your story, or just vent
🎤 Got a call that changed you? Submit your story — we’ll carry it with care (and maybe a little dark humor).
⚠️ Disclaimer: This podcast contains graphic content, emotional storytelling, and dark humor based on real-life EMS and first responder experiences. Listener discretion is advised.
Any medical discussion is personal opinion, not medical advice. Always follow your local protocols, medical direction, and training guidelines.
This podcast isn’t about fairy tales. It’s about real calls, real chaos, and the medics who survive both.
Dispatched & Dysfunctional — because sometimes the worst calls… make the best stories.