In this episode of Hey Julia Woods, Julia dives deep into the often misunderstood concept of self-care—and how it can radically transform your marriage. Far beyond bubble baths and spa days, authentic self-care is about nurturing your spirit, soul, and body in a way that builds emotional resilience and deepens connection with your spouse.

Julia shares powerful insights from years of coaching couples through disconnection, codependency, and burnout. She unpacks how the lack of self-care leads to resentment, unhealthy patterns, and loneliness in marriage—and how learning to "mother yourself" can create space for healing, intimacy, and sustainable love.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in your relationship, overextended in your role, or unsure how to care for yourself without feeling guilty, this episode is for you. You’ll learn practical ways to recognize emotional depletion, set healthy boundaries, and show up in your marriage from a place of fullness rather than need.

Whether you’re navigating marriage struggles, working on personal growth, or just want to build a stronger emotional foundation, this conversation will equip you with tools to reconnect with yourself—and your partner.

Create the connection you long for by attending the next Breakthrough event 

https://beautifuloutcome.com/retreat-sept-25

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

Josh and Mandy share their journey from feeling profoundly disconnected in marriage to rediscovering genuine intimacy and connection through intentional conversations and personal growth.

• Previously at a level 8 loneliness despite living life together

• Discovered they were living "parallel lives" with clearly divided responsibilities

• Found looking into each other's eyes exposed they hadn't truly connected in years

• Learned to identify how their own self-criticism shaped how they heard their partner

• Recognized the danger of emotional apathy that had crept into their relationship

• Committed to weekly intentional conversations about difficult topics

• Navigated their first breakthrough by realizing they were having two different conversations

• Discovered it's okay to need each other rather than maintaining rigid independence

• Reported their loneliness level dropped from 8 to 2 in just 8-10 weeks

• Created a new vision for their marriage beyond what they had witnessed in their parents

If you're feeling disconnected in your marriage, know you're not alone. We invite you to take the first step by identifying one area of tension you can discuss with your spouse this week, and remember – the relationship you have with yourself sets the tone for your marriage.

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

Behn and Katie transformed their five-year marriage from emotional roommates to genuine partners in just two months by learning to communicate through their different emotional styles. They share their powerful journey of overcoming disconnection, victimhood patterns, and the fear of vulnerability.

• Behn struggled with recognizing and expressing his emotions

• Katie felt emotionally abandoned by Ben

• Their communication styles created conflict – Katie's was explosive and emotional, Behn logical and fact-based

• Their breakthrough moment came from focusing on themselves rather than trying to fix each other

• Learning to identify emotions daily created new patterns of connection

• They now view arguments as beneficial rather than destructive

• Community support from other couples normalized their challenges and provided motivation

• Traditional counseling focused on past baggage, while coaching helped them craft a different future

Now, through intentional work, they're building a relationship where conflict brings them closer together rather than pushing them apart.

Create the connection you long for by attending the next Breakthrough event 

https://beautifuloutcome.com/retreat-sept-25

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer

🎁 FREE GIFT:  Turn Defensiveness into Connection! 

https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

Marriage disconnection often stems from three powerful yet hidden forces: self-reliance, self-sufficiency, and self-absorption that create patterns of isolation within relationships.

• Self-reliance tricks us into thinking we must figure everything out alone

• Self-sufficiency creates the false belief that having needs is weakness

• Self-absorption naturally follows when we focus only on our own experiences

• Codependent family backgrounds often teach us it's unsafe to need others

• Daily FANOS exercise helps couples practice healthy interdependence (Feelings, Affirmation, Needs, Ownership, Struggle/Sobriety)

• Recovery from "independence addiction" requires vulnerability and confession

• Creating safe spaces to express needs transforms relationship dynamics

• Community support is essential for marriage growth and healing

• True connection emerges when we accept our design as relational beings

If you're looking for support on your marriage journey, join me for Breakthrough, my couples communication workshop.

https://beautifuloutcome.com/retreat-sept-25

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer

🎁 FREE GIFT:  Turn Defensiveness into Connection! 

https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

What turns a failing marriage around? This couple went from constant conflict and near-divorce to 75% fewer arguments and a renewed connection—not through better communication, but by taking full responsibility for their own patterns.

He uncovered the fear behind his anger. She faced how her independence blocked intimacy. The shift came when they stopped straddling the line and fully committed.

Now, daily life looks radically different—more love, less tension, and quick conflict resolution. If you're ready for real change, this episode offers hope and a path forward. Subscribe now to join Julia’s community of growth-minded couples.

https://beautifuloutcome.com/retreat-sept-25

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/marriage-growth-community

🎁 FREE GIFT:  Turn Defensiveness into Connection! 

https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

Joe and Em had four kids, full-time careers, and a system that worked—on the surface. But behind the schedules and chores, they were lonely and disconnected.

In today’s Hey Julia Woods episode, they share how their marriage drifted into survival mode—and how one simple habit brought it back to life: daily emotional check-ins.

By asking, “What did you feel angry about today?” they stopped avoiding conflict and started building trust again.

Their story is raw, relatable, and full of hope for couples stuck in the logistics trap.

Join us at Beautiful Outcome's Breakthrough Retreats to learn practical tools for transforming tension in your marriage into opportunities for deeper connection.

https://beautifuloutcome.com/retreat-sept-25

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

Michael shares his transformative journey from retreating from difficult conversations with his wife to embracing curiosity, resulting in a 300% increase in his ability to stay engaged during tense moments.

• Michael went from staying curious in two out of ten conversations to eight out of ten
• He identified his tendency to retreat when feeling "not enough" during disagreements
• The dynamic of his wife having a stronger voice in discussions made him prone to giving up
• Recognizing physical signs of defensiveness (tightened stomach muscles) helps him pause before reacting
• Viewing his wife as a resource rather than an opponent transformed their communication
• Staying in "your own backyard" focuses on managing your responses rather than your partner's
• Vulnerability in sharing when feeling defensive creates space for honest communication
• Checking in with "where are you?" regarding emotions helps identify what's really happening internally
• Tensions in proactive vs. reactive approaches to parenting provided practical examples
• Breakthrough Retreats provide focused opportunities to practice new communication skills

Join us at Beautiful Outcome's Breakthrough Retreats to learn practical tools for transforming tension in your marriage into opportunities for deeper connection.

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

Marriage breakthrough happens beyond what we think we know.

Have you ever considered that the very certainties you hold about your spouse might be the walls blocking the connection you crave? In this raw and transformative episode, I share the profound revelation that changed everything in my own marriage—discovering the power of what I didn't know I didn't know.

We explore how our earliest experiences shape 90% of our core beliefs about relationships, and how confirmation bias continuously filters our perception to maintain these beliefs, whether they serve us or not. I vulnerably share how my husband and I were trapped in a cycle of disconnection because we both "knew" he wasn't interested in deep conversation. The loneliness grew unbearable until we were willing to challenge this fundamental belief.

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...

Allie shares her transformative journey from nearly divorcing her husband due to addiction and dishonesty to discovering how her own fear of criticism was causing her to walk on eggshells in her marriage.

• Discovering that her "confirmation bias" was constantly seeking evidence of criticism from others
• Learning that she had developed the habit of manipulating situations to avoid facing potential criticism
• Recognizing how her dishonesty about her needs and feelings mirrored the dishonesty she resented in her husband
• Understanding how walking on eggshells robbed her of joy, authentic relationships, and peace
• Developing the ability to speak honestly about her needs without fear
• Practicing "generous listening" to hear what's actually being said rather than filtering through criticism
• Taking responsibility for her own "backyard" rather than focusing on her husband's behavior
• Finding that true joy comes from internal changes, not expecting others to behave differently

If you're walking on eggshells in your relationship or constantly anticipating criticism, examine your own patterns. The path to more joy and connection begins with owning your voice and being honest about your needs.

_______

💥💥Everything you need to grow the marriage you long for is waiting for you in the Marriage Growth Community:

https://beautifuloutcome.com/mgc-one-time-offer


🎁 Free Gift for you! 100 Prompts and Ideas to Connect with your Spouse!

🎁 FREE GIFT: Turn Defensiveness into Connection! https://beautifuloutcome.com/e-guide

_

👉 Take the free communication quiz! What’s YOUR communication type?! https://beautifuloutcome.com/communication-quiz

_______

Where you can find me:

INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
YOUTUBE: Subscribe to @HeyJuliaWoods
SHOP: Marriage resources in my storefront
RETREATS: Attend a Marriage Workshop
WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.com
FACEBOOK: ...