Tessa and Morgan dissect Ben Affleck's appearance on Theo Von (4/24/2025).

🔥 Topics we cover:

• The "understudy dwarf" energy: Batman complaining about being too famous while doing podcast tours

• How to spend $1,100/hour on an owl while crafting an underdog narrative

• The Jennifer Lopez omission: more time on Dunkin Donuts than his second marriage

• Batman suit at the office like a divorced dad's trophy—his own kid was terrified

• "I'm kind of shy" while strutting shirtless at Met Galas with full contractor chest

• Following Christopher Lloyd for six blocks as a kid, now mad people follow him

• Two Oscars but convinced everyone else got more famous (Matt Damon trauma is real)

• "The crowd in my head is busy enough"—when Theo Von calls you out for overthinking

• Constructing mystery while explaining daddy issues and back pain to podcasters

• Why he won't name his kids on air but talks about petting small dogs causing injuries

• The calculated uncalculation of being relatable while spending millions on bad movies

• From "Indian Jones" Harvard mistakes to accountant sequel demographic targeting

• How divorce co-parenting became "we do pretty good together" (bar in hell)

• The art of turning existential crisis into IMAX entertainment

• Why Ben Affleck is the spiritual embodiment of smoking durries at your own premiere