Collective Café To Go

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We continued our live read of Crucial Conversations and today was all about skills for mastering your stories. The steps are as follows:

  • Retrace your Path
  • Notice your Behavior
  • Put your Feelings into Words
  • Analyze your Stories
  • Get Back to the Facts
  • Watch for 3 Clever Stories (Victim, Villain and Helpless)
  • Tell the Rest of the Story (Victims become Actors, Villains become Humans, Helpless become Able) 


    • This was episode 180 of our week-daily virtual coffee, which takes place in Konktown’s discord server: discord.gg/konktown and Clubhouse’s Startup Club House from 8-9am EST. It's free and open to anyone from anywhere in the world.


    Some of the key highlights from today's discussion included:

    • Discussing skills for mastering our stories, such as retracing our path, putting feelings into words, analyzing stories, and telling the rest of the story
    • The importance of separating facts from subjective interpretations in stories
    • Recognizing "clever stories" like victim, villain, and helpless stories that people tell to justify actions
    • Learning to question our own role in problems rather than see ourselves only as victims 
    • The value of humanizing others rather than making villain stories in order to improve communication
    • Taking responsibility and accountability for our own actions and using dialogue skills rather than feeling helpless


      • Show notes based on our discussion (as per Otter.ai's beta tool):

       

      Crucial Conversations book and avoiding passive aggression. (1:27)

      Controlling emotions through storytelling. (5:31)

      Recognizing and managing emotions. (11:00)

      Storytelling and emotional control. (16:59)

      Separating facts from subjective interpretations. (23:03)

      Crucial conversations and self-justifying stories. (28:57)

      Storytelling and its impact on relationships. (35:39)

      Storytelling and its impact on behavior. (39:43)

      Self-justification through storytelling. (44:12)

      Self-awareness and empathy in communication. (48:25)

      Improving communication and relationships at work. (53:11)

      Overcoming emotional blocks in communication. (58:26)

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      Collective Café To GoBy Joseph Jaffe