When it’s done occasionally, none of these are bad choices. When it’s a way of life, it’s a recipe for a meltdown.

Instead of getting a small confrontation over with, a million small confrontations with the same person pile up until an explosion of frustration and anger happens. Instead of saying what you mean clearly and firmly, a boundary remains unset until a person trespasses once too often, sparking an uprising that surprises them.

If this sounds like you or someone you know, listen up – this is a very unfair way to treat people you care about, yet it’s commonly thought of as “polite.”

Screw polite – you have as much right to your feelings, words, and opinions as anyone else, and when you hold them in until you explode, you hurt the relationship in ways that may not be fixable.

This kind of “politeness” can be tough to change – begin today to express your feelings, thoughts, and needs. Start small, build your confidence, and learn to stand up for yourself.

If you don’t do it, who will?

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