In this episode of 'How to Recover', Hattie Moll speaks with psychologist Barlas Gunay about the impact of psychologically immature parents and the lasting effects of childhood trauma. They discuss the importance of understanding trauma, the role of trauma-informed therapy, and the practice of reparenting oneself. Barlas emphasizes the need for accountability in family dynamics and the significance of expressing anger in a healthy way. The conversation also touches on estrangement from family members and the complexities of navigating these relationships.

Find Barlas at @acceptandact on Instagram and join his community via Patreon or work with him directly through the link on his bio on Instagram.

The content of this podcast is for informational and conversational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or therapeutic advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Although we speak with experts and explore personal experiences of recovery, nothing shared should be considered personal or professional advice.

If you’re struggling with your mental health or experiencing distress, we strongly encourage you to seek support from a qualified healthcare professional or licensed therapist.

Any views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the hosts or the podcast team.”

Come backstage on the How to Recover podcast with Zoe and Hattie for the real talk behind the recovery world. Deep dive into the messy world of their own imperfect recovery. Enjoy their great escape from narcs, sex, drink, debt, drama and trauma. They’ve done it all, to death.

In this conversation, Hattie and Zoe delve into the complexities of recovery from childhood trauma and addiction. They discuss the slow nature of healing, the impact of dysfunctional family dynamics, and the importance of understanding one's own emotional needs. The conversation emphasizes the necessity of feeling emotions to heal, the role of information in recovery, and the journey towards becoming one's own loving parent. They also touch on the significance of somatic healing and the grieving process for what was not received in childhood.

You can find out more about ACA here ⁠https://www.adultchildrenofalcoholics.co.uk/⁠

And here's a link to the blog Hattie mentions

⁠https://acoarecovery.blog/⁠

Keywords: recovery, addiction, childhood trauma, emotional neglect, healing, adult children of alcoholics, mental health, therapy, self-help, personal growth

Warning: this episode contains adult content including detailed descriptions of domestic violence and murder.

In this conversation, Sangeeta Pillai shares her remarkable journey from the slums of Mumbai to becoming an award-winning podcast creator and author. She discusses the impact of her traumatic childhood, the role of literature in her healing process, and the complexities of family dynamics. Sangeeta's story highlights the struggles faced by South Asian women and the importance of finding one's voice amidst cultural expectations. Through her experiences, she emphasises the painful yet transformative nature of healing and the power of storytelling. In this conversation, Sangeeta shares her journey from breaking into the competitive advertising industry to navigating the challenges of mental health and trauma. She discusses the importance of finding the right therapist, exploring alternative healing modalities, and connecting with her ancestral roots. Sangeeta also reveals her plans to create a retreat in Kerala, focusing on real spirituality and giving back to the community. The discussion emphasizes resilience, empowerment, and the transformative power of healing.

baddaughter.co.uk

The energetic healer Hattie mentions can be found here https://lifeforcenergy.com/therapies/

Book an appointment with Zoe Clews or one of her associates at https://zoeclews-hypnotherapy.co.uk/

Email the podcast at [email protected]

keywords: Sangeeta Pillai, Bad Daughter, trauma, healing, South Asian women, identity, literature, family dynamics, violence, grief, advertising, mental health, trauma, healing, therapy, ancestral roots, retreat, creativity, resilience, empowerment

Ruwan Meepagala joins Zoe and Hattie to discuss his experiences of entering and exiting Nicole Daedone's wellness organisation turned high control sex cult, One Taste. The podcast is released on the eve of her sentencing for being found guilty of using abuse and deception to obtain labour and services from her victims.

We pull apart the customs and behaviours of One Taste including some rather explicit and funny chat about what the men got out of all that clitoral stimulation. And we discuss how cults entice and hold members until they inevitably fall apart.

In the case of One Taste, the huge rise and dramatic fall of the cult that put feminine pleasure at the heart of its belief system, has been well documented with a special you can watch on Netflix. Ruwan gives us the guy's perspective and explains the childhood and adolescence that set him up to find an alternative way to live.

We also discuss the ways One Taste gave Ruwan a chance to heal old wounds and the very obvious fact that cults offer benefits as well as trauma otherwise they wouldn't be so damn persistent.

Ruwan is an established men's coach and therapist and we talk about the new(ish) cults spearheaded by Andrew Tate and the red pill, black pill worlds of online masculine.

Hattie talks about her experience of the influence of it all on her two teenage sons and the fact it is all just another way for people to make a quick buck off our kids.

Zoe brings her decades of experience as a hypnotherapist to explain how the techniques of NLP and hypnotism are used by cults to inculcate their members and Ruwan describes his personal experiences of this.

To buy Ruwan's book Orgsm and learn more about his coaching visit his website https://ruwando.com/

To contact the podcast, email or send a voice note to: [email protected]

To book an appointment with Zoe Clews or any of her team email: [email protected]

To complain about the dodgy editing of the podcast, do not message Hattie at: [email protected]

The podcast is produced and directed by Zoe and Hattie with no adult supervision.

We make reference to NXIVM another cult with a great documentary series called The Vow should you wish to go further down the cult rabbit hole.

Warning: This episode includes discussions of childhood adversity and a violent assault. Please listen with care.

In this moving episode of 'How to Recover', hosts Zoe Clews and Hattie Moll engage in a profound conversation with Dan Newman, founder of Baldilocks. Dan shares his journey from experiencing a violent assault that left him with emotional and physical scars to transforming his pain into purpose through Baldilocks, a movement aimed at challenging stigma around alopecia and promoting self-acceptance. The discussion delves into themes of childhood trauma, the freeze response to trauma, and the importance of community and connection in the recovery process. Dan emphasises the significance of empathy, humour, and dignity in supporting those affected by hair loss. The episode highlights the power of resilience and the journey towards healing and empowerment.

Takeaways

Recovery is about building something beautiful from trauma.

Dan's journey illustrates the transformation of pain into purpose.

Childhood trauma can have lasting effects on self-image and confidence.

The freeze response is a common reaction to trauma that can leave individuals feeling immobilised.

Empathy and connection are crucial in supporting those dealing with hair loss.

Baldilocks aims to create a community of support for individuals with alopecia.

Humour can be a powerful tool in overcoming adversity and stigma.

It's important to create safe spaces for individuals to feel seen and understood.

The journey of recovery often involves confronting and processing shame.

Baldilocks represents a movement towards dignity and empowerment for those with hair loss.

Sound bites

"Humor is our third value."

"You are a guardian of dignity."

"You don't have to keep suffering."

The music featured is Julia Jacklin's Pressure to Party from the album Crushing.

The episode is produced and edited by Hattie Moll with Michele Orlando.

Warning: This episode includes discussions of child abuse and a violent assault. Please listen with care.

In this moving episode of 'How to Recover', hosts Zoe Clews and Hattie Moll engage in a profound conversation with Dan Newman, founder of Baldilocks. Dan shares his journey from experiencing a violent assault that left him with emotional and physical scars to transforming his pain into purpose through Baldilocks, a movement aimed at challenging stigma around alopecia and promoting self-acceptance. The discussion delves into themes of childhood trauma, the freeze response to trauma, and the importance of community and connection in the recovery process. Dan emphasises the significance of empathy, humour, and dignity in supporting those affected by hair loss. The episode highlights the power of resilience and the journey towards healing and empowerment.

The music featured on How to Recover is Julia Jacklin's Pressure to Party from the album Crushing.

The episode is produced and edited by Hattie Moll with Michele Orlando.

Takeaways

Recovery is about building something beautiful from trauma.

Dan's journey illustrates the transformation of pain into purpose.

Childhood trauma can have lasting effects on self-image and confidence.

The freeze response is a common reaction to trauma that can leave individuals feeling immobilised.

Empathy and connection are crucial in supporting those dealing with hair loss.

Baldilocks aims to create a community of support for individuals with alopecia.

Humour can be a powerful tool in overcoming adversity and stigma.

It's important to create safe spaces for individuals to feel seen and understood.

The journey of recovery often involves confronting and processing shame.

Baldilocks represents a movement towards dignity and empowerment for those with hair loss.

Sound bites

"Humour is our third value."

"You are a guardian of dignity."

"You don't have to keep suffering."

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Recovery and Resilience

01:36 Dan Newman's Journey: From Trauma to Transformation

12:15 The Impact of Childhood Trauma

22:02 Understanding the Freeze Response

32:01 Finding Purpose in Pain: The Birth of Baldilocks

46:47 Creating Community and Connection through Baldilocks

Take care when listening: contains themes of childhood abuse and traumatic experiences that may be upsetting for some listeners.

Today on How to Recover, we’re joined by Natalie Lue — writer, speaker, artist and creator of the much-loved Baggage Reclaim platform and author of several books, including the Joy of Saying No. Natalie has been helping people untangle the complicated patterns that keep them stuck in unhealthy relationships, low self-esteem, and people-pleasing for a long time!. Through her books, podcast, and workshops, she has guided millions of readers and listeners towards healthier boundaries, greater self-awareness, and a more compassionate relationship with themselves.

Natalie’s work is deeply personal — born out of her own experiences of childhood trauma and abandonment and learning how to reclaim her own sense of self. She brings a rare combination of honesty, humour, and practical wisdom to conversations about recovery, whether that’s from heartbreak, perfectionism, or the lingering impact of old wounds.

Hosted by Zoe Clews and Hattie Moll

https://natalielue.com/

https://baggagereclaim.co.uk/

https://zoeclews-hypnotherapy.co.uk/

They discuss how childhood experiences shape adult relationships and the importance of setting boundaries for emotional well-being. The dialogue emphasises the journey towards authenticity and the need to break free from toxic patterns, highlighting personal stories and insights that resonate with many listeners. In this conversation, Natalie Lue discusses the impact of childhood trauma on adult relationships and the various styles of people-pleasing that can emerge from these experiences. She emphasizes the importance of self-awareness, setting boundaries, and the journey of personal growth. The discussion also touches on the challenges of navigating relationships, particularly in the context of parenting, and the necessity of embracing change for emotional health.

The podcast is produced and edited by Hattie Moll - we are looking for a professional editor and producer to help us out so please get in touch if that is you. [email protected]

If any of the issues in the podcast are affecting you contact [email protected] and book an appointment to discuss how Zoe or one of her team can help.

12 step recovery meetings for Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families take place around the world for free every day of the week. You can find out more about ACoA or find a meeting online at this link adultchildren.org

Keywords:

healing, recovery, people-pleasing, relationships, childhood trauma, emotional well-being, boundaries, self-awareness, personal growth, authenticity, childhood trauma, people-pleasing, self-discovery, boundaries, personal growth, relationships, emotional health, coping mechanisms, mental health, self-care

Take care when listening: contains themes of childhood abuse and traumatic experiences that may be upsetting for some listeners.

Today on How to Recover, we’re joined by Natalie Lue — writer, speaker, artist and creator of the much-loved Baggage Reclaim platform and author of several books, including the Joy of Saying No. Natalie has been helping people untangle the complicated patterns that keep them stuck in unhealthy relationships, low self-esteem, and people-pleasing for a long time!. Through her books, podcast, and workshops, she has guided millions of readers and listeners towards healthier boundaries, greater self-awareness, and a more compassionate relationship with themselves.

Natalie’s work is deeply personal — born out of her own experiences of childhood trauma and abandonment and learning how to reclaim her own sense of self. She brings a rare combination of honesty, humour, and practical wisdom to conversations about recovery, whether that’s from heartbreak, perfectionism, or the lingering impact of old wounds.

Hosted by Zoe Clews and Hattie Moll

https://natalielue.com/

https://baggagereclaim.co.uk/

https://zoeclews-hypnotherapy.co.uk/

They discuss how childhood experiences shape adult relationships and the importance of setting boundaries for emotional well-being. The dialogue emphasises the journey towards authenticity and the need to break free from toxic patterns, highlighting personal stories and insights that resonate with many listeners. In this conversation, Natalie Lue discusses the impact of childhood trauma on adult relationships and the various styles of people-pleasing that can emerge from these experiences. She emphasizes the importance of self-awareness, setting boundaries, and the journey of personal growth. The discussion also touches on the challenges of navigating relationships, particularly in the context of parenting, and the necessity of embracing change for emotional health.

The podcast is produced and edited by Hattie Moll - we are looking for a professional editor and producer to help us out so please get in touch if that is you. [email protected]

If any of the issues in the podcast are affecting you contact [email protected] and book an appointment to discuss how Zoe or one of her team can help.

12 step recovery meetings for Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families take place around the world for free every day of the week. You can find out more about ACoA or find a meeting online at this link adultchildren.org

Keywords:

healing, recovery, people-pleasing, relationships, childhood trauma, emotional well-being, boundaries, self-awareness, personal growth, authenticity, childhood trauma, people-pleasing, self-discovery, boundaries, personal growth, relationships, emotional health, coping mechanisms, mental health, self-care

WARNING: Please take care when listening to this episode, it covers topics that can create strong reactions if you have experienced any of these situations (and sometimes even if you haven't). Self-harming - we talk in depth about the reasoning behind it and how to manage it as a parent with kids going through it. We also discuss Henry's experience of dissociative episodes and homelessness, addiction to alcohol and drugs and trauma experienced through the lack of understanding of his neurodivergence as a young boy and boarding school trauma. Listen with care if any of these issues are personal to you.

Keywords

mental health, trauma recovery, self-harm, addiction, neurodiversity, childhood trauma, therapy, coping strategies, healing, personal journey, self-discovery, addiction, recovery, healing, transformation, mental health, inner child, therapy, self-love, personal growth

Summary

In this conversation, Henry shares his profound journey through childhood trauma, mental health struggles, and the path to recovery. He discusses the impact of dissociation, self-harm, and addiction, emphasizing the importance of connection and understanding in healing. Through his experiences, he highlights the challenges faced by neurodiverse individuals and the role of education and support in fostering resilience. Henry's story serves as a testament to the power of vulnerability and the ongoing journey of self-discovery and growth. In this conversation, Henry shares his profound journey of self-discovery, addiction, and recovery. He discusses the importance of facing one's darkness to find light and emphasizes the transformative power of therapy and self-love. The conversation explores the significance of inner child work in healing and the nature of self-destruction as a result of the absence of love. Henry's unique approach to therapy, rooted in intuition and empathy, highlights the need for safe spaces for sharing and healing. Ultimately, his story serves as a reminder that everyone is deserving of love and healing.

Titles

From Trauma to Triumph: Henry's Story

Navigating the Shadows: A Journey of Healing

Sound bites

"I was born within two worlds."

"I felt truly accepted."

"I was just a drip."

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to the Journey

05:39 The Role of Self-Harm in Identity Formation

08:32 Navigating Self-Harm and Parental Reactions

11:46 The Intersection of Trauma and Healing

14:26 Exploring Neurodiversity and Perception

17:29 The Spiritual Dimensions of Trauma

20:30 The Complexity of Self-Destruction

23:29 Finding Meaning in Pain

26:27 The Importance of Compassionate Communication

32:10 Navigating Shame and Trust in Parenting

33:34 The Evolution of Self-Destructive Behaviors

34:58 Understanding Self-Soothing vs. Self-Destruction

36:53 The Impact of External Judgments on Identity

38:18 The Role of Substances in Coping Mechanisms

41:41 The Search for Normalcy Through Alcohol and Drugs

44:06 The Illusion of Inclusion Through Substance Use

47:26 The Dark Side of Addiction and Identity

49:24 Finding Acceptance in a Psych Ward

54:00 The Descent into Addiction and Its Consequences

01:01:46 The Journey of Self-Discovery

01:10:10 Rock Bottom and Recovery

01:24:31 The Path to Healing and Self-Love

01:28:49 Healing Through Connection

01:29:48 Navigating Masculinity and Vulnerability

01:30:42 The Predatory Nature of Recovery Spaces

01:32:20 Finding Safe Spaces in Recovery

01:34:00 The Inner Child and Self-Discovery

01:36:08 Facing the Darkness Within

01:38:25 Intuitive Healing and Transformation

01:39:56 The Journey to Becoming a Healer

01:47:52 Embracing the Healing Process

01:50:49 The Power of Sharing and Authenticity

Should people in early recovery preach to others about recovery? In this pretty meta conversation Zoe and Hattie discuss Liz Gilbert's latest memoir. Hattie and Zoe talk about their own desire to be evangelical about recovery and the rooms and their own understanding of why that probably isn't always a good thing.

Audio only

Come backstage on the How to Recover podcast with Zoe and Hattie for the real talk behind the recovery world. Deep dive into the messy world of their own imperfect recovery. Enjoy their great escape from narcs, sex, drink, debt, drama and trauma. They’ve done it all, to death.

In this episode of No One Asked, hosts Hattie Moll and Zoe Clews delve into the complexities of recovery, focusing on themes of addiction, codependency, and the impact of childhood experiences on adult relationships. They discuss Liz Gilbert's new book, exploring the nuances of love addiction and the importance of understanding one's inner child in the recovery process. The conversation also touches on the challenges of sharing personal recovery journeys publicly and the significance of anonymity in recovery programs.