This week on the Wake the F*** Up! Podcast, Alix and David sit down for a deep dive into living authentically. First up on the docket is people pleasing. As a recovering former people pleaser Alix is an expert on this topic and has been wanting to do an episode about people-pleasing to share her learnings and tips with our listeners. Alix shares her experience with people pleasing as a trauma response, as well as related topics like self-sabotage. 

Later in the episode Alix and David talk more about how past traumas can impact behaviors in current relationships. This will be a familiar theme for any of our listeners who have experienced major loss, grief, or trauma. Alex shares her journey to authenticity after losing her first husband Carl, highlighting that an essential step to embracing authenticity is vulnerability, and one of the big parts of “waking up” comes when you transition from valuing the appearance of happiness, to genuine contentment.

So how do you recover from being a people-pleaser? Therapy may help! And we’ll also share some books and online resources below. In this episode you’ll hear Alix and David talk about their journey with therapy, personal growth, and the signifigance of authenticity in all relationships, even in the face of challenging societal expectations.

Stick around for the end of the episode when our hosts discuss self-abandonment, and how hiding one's true self can lead to deep feelings of loneliness. Good communication is essential for bridging the internal and external selves. Another crucial tool for breaking self-abandonment patterns is acknowledging bodily responses to stress - Alix takes a quick detour into Polyvagal theory for those interested. We hope that this episode can serve as a primer for anyone looking to heal from people-pleasing tendencies and embrace authenticity for fulfilling relationships.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Read more about people pleasing as a trauma response - article in Psychology Today

Book - The Body Keeps Score, by Bessel van der Kolk

Book - Codependent No More by Melody Beattie

Check out these book recommendations - 5 Essential Books People Pleasers Must Read

Alix’s blog - My Birthday Promise to Carl: Live Fully & Authentically

Curious about Polyvagal theory? Click here for a quick explainer 

Connect with us!

Download the WAKE app on the Apple App Store or Google Play Store  

Visit our website to learn more about WAKE Wellness

Follow WAKE on Instagram @thewakewellness

Follow Alix on Instagram: @alixlongwinded

Follow Grace Pilates and Yoga on Instagram @choosegracenola