Sometimes we don't realize how childhood trauma can show up in adulthood. Even the most supportive parents often tell children "not to worry about it," or "they didn't mean it," or "it's not that big of a deal." So it's not surprising that it can be difficult to sit with uncomfortable emotions. Tony goes through Dr. Andrea Brandt's article "9 Steps to Healing Childhood Trauma as an Adult," https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mindful-anger/201804/9-steps-healing-childhood-trauma-adult

Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sign up for Tony’s “Magnetize Your Marriage” virtual workshop. The cost is only $19. You’ll learn the top 3 things you can do NOW to create a Magnetic Marriage. 

You can learn more about Tony's pornography recovery program, The Path Back, by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs and podcasts.

Tony mentioned a product that he used to take out all of the "uh's" and "um's" that, in his words, "must be created by wizards and magic!" because it's that good! To learn more about Descript, click here https://descript.com?lmref=bSWcEQ

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Come on in and take a seat.

[00:00:22] Hey, Rudy, welcome to episode 325 of the Virtual Couch. I am your host, Tony Overbay. I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, a certified mindful habit coach, a writer, a speaker, a husband, a father of four, and creator of The Path Back, which is an online recovery pornography recovery program that is helping people reclaim their lives from turning to unhealthy coping mechanisms. So if you want more information about that, go to Pathbackrecovery.com and have an amazing group that meets every week. It's online through online telehealth, zoom, that sort of thing. And it's just a strength based. It's empowering. So if you want help in overcoming unhealthy coping mechanisms, go to Pathbackrecovery.com. And I'm going to leave up a place on my website at Tony over Bacon's workshop. And there I have it's a $19 hour and a half workshop that tells you everything you need to know about how to show up in a relationship, especially in marriage. Because I feel like we truly don't have the tools that we need. I'm talking no one does until you have to go find the tools. And you don't find the tools until you've gone through some things in your relationship or your marriage so you don't even have to have a bad relationship to go check this out. I talk about all the things, all the childhood abandonment and attachment wounds and how we show up like that in our adult relationships and how we really we really don't even understand what it means to be two people to individual people before we can be one person.

[00:01:39] And that's the Esther Perel quote, and it's a beautiful quote. So go to Tony Bacon's workshop to find out more. And I've got a lot of workshops that I have planned that are coming up that will deal with a lot of different issues. I look forward to telling you more about those things and head over to the Waking Up to Narcissism podcast. I have an interview coming out this Friday with a gentleman named Ross Rosenberg, and he wrote a book called The Human Magnet Syndrome. And Ross is doing some phenomenal work about redefining the concepts of what codependency is and talking about renaming it self love deficit disorder. And it is it's a really, really healing way to look at if you are in unhealthy relationships, whether it's with a spouse or there's the parent, whether it's with a church, an institution, and that really the self love deficit is something that is so common in a lot of us. So when you hear people say things like, you need to go work on yourself, you need to love yourself, you need to be able to validate yourself internally so often. That sounds awesome, but we don't really know what that means.