On the 17th episode of The Matters Of The Heart podcast, I have the honour of having the beautiful, and vibrant Funmi Adewumi in our midst.

She's a humanitarian, domestic violence adviser, mental health advocate, and a qualified NLP Master Practitioner.  She has over 25 years of work experience shared between the public and private sectors in the UK and Nigeria respectively.  She has developed strong leadership and an unconquerable ''can do'' spirit with which she now pursues the joy of lifting others up, particularly the bruised and abused. Her heart for women and the vulnerable is easily felt in her first published book.

She shared her vulnerability with us by taking us through her marital and life journeys, the obstacles faced and how she overcame her fears and emotional torture which metamorphosed to her becoming a transformational coach. She saw her dark moments as a time to draw closer to God and kept learning and researching daily, acquiring knowledge and skills to become the better version of herself. 

We covered areas like: 

- 3:50 Introduction

-  5:20 Her childhood story which she said was really interesting because her parents were loving and magnanimous always wanting to helping others.  Her parents were disciplinarians with her mum called the strict one. She didn't spare them in their upbringing ensuring that they got some value from their upbringing. She realised later that this was done out of love because they wanted the best for her and her siblings. She realised it brought out the survival instinct in her which has paid off to her now reflecting back.

- 17:08 She shared her marriage journey with us which she started pretty early.  She highlighted that her first marriage amplified their differences as she was an introvert while her husband was an extrovert and loved to party but marriage did not change this for him. This was the case in other areas of the marriage as well as it was obvious that they were generally not on the same page. This carried on for 10 years before they both talked about it and finally went their separate ways.

- 23:00 She shared her 2nd marriage journey with us. Single for 15 years until she met her 2nd husband. She felt she was matured to take decisions and knew what she was doing. Even though she saw the handwriting on the wall because he was once married but she felt she had things under control. The marriage was smooth for about 6 months before they started having issues.

- 40:00 What led her to converting from Islam to Christianity. She had been getting church invitations from friends she started to seek the face of God and found God for herself. With this she was convinced

- 43: 00 The stumbling blocks to people resigning themselves to fate. She shed some light on this which she classed as toxic stress

- 45: 10 The growth mindset which she said is really key to moving forward and fulfilling our purpose in life.

- 47: 00 Going ahead with her 2nd marriage even though she saw the warning signs. Mindset plays a huge role in this. She expressed that if people can find their identity they would handle things better.

- 51:30 How she's been able to turn her adversity into strength. This she said has been a progressive journey.
- 1:05:15 Her final words of encouragement

Coach Funmi's book ''I Am Better Than This'' can be found on Amazon and https://selectivelife.thinkific.com/

Connect with coach Funmi on her IG handle @selectivelifeglobal
As a goodwill gesture Coach Funmi has agreed to give free copies to anyone going through abuse so feel free to reach out to her.

Don't forget to share with your friends and loved ones. You can also follow us, like and subscribe so that you can be first to know when the next episode drops.