What happens when you spend so long supporting everyone else that you begin to lose sight of yourself?

In this episode of A Thought I Kept, I talk to coach and charity co-founder Lois Jackson about caregiving, identity, emotional wellbeing and learning to matter in your own life too.

In 2017, Lois’s fiancé, former professional rugby player Ed Jackson, suffered a life-changing spinal cord injury. Lois threw herself into supporting his recovery, repeatedly telling herself: “It’s not about me.” Her thought for this episode turns that belief around: “It is about me.”

We talk about what it means to care for others without losing yourself, the pressure of being “the strong one”, and why acknowledging your own emotions and needs can feel so vulnerable. Lois shares how honesty helped her reconnect with herself and her relationship, and what she has learned about self-trust, identity, boundaries and finding your way forward when life changes unexpectedly.

We also explore trauma and recovery, grief, hope, the healing power of nature and community, and why progress is often measured in millimetres rather than mountains. This is a conversation about the people who hold everything together, the gap between being fine and feeling fulfilled, and the possibility of caring deeply for others while making space for yourself too.

If you have ever wondered where you have gone in your own life, this conversation might offer a gentle reminder: perhaps it gets to be about you too.

Lois Jackson is a resilience and identity coach who works with people who've spent a long time being everything to everyone and are quietly wondering who they actually are underneath all of it.

With an ICF certification and an NLP Practitioner qualification she brings genuine depth to the work. But what she brings more than anything is lived experience of caring, of losing, of rebuilding, and of learning, later than she'd like to admit, that she was also allowed to be in the story.

Lois co-founded Millimetres 2 Mountains with her husband Ed, a charity that helps people discover what they're capable of through outdoor challenge and community. Which tells you something about how she thinks identity is best rebuilt: not just in a therapy room, but moving through something hard, preferably with good people and a decent view.

Lois’s website | M2M Website | Instagram

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About Claire Fitzsimmons

Claire is the host of A Thought I Kept, a wellbeing writer and the co-founder of If Lost Start Here. As an ICF Associate Certified Coach and a certified Emotions Coach Practitioner, Claire helps people navigate the everyday lost moments of their lives and all the feelings, from anxiety to grief, overwhelm to disconnection. 

Buy Claire's first book, If Lost Start Here: Wellbeing for the Anxious, Disconnected or Uncertain here.

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Find out how to work with Claire here. 

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