Recorded: May 27, 2018 / Published: July 16, 2018
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Rules to Love by:
Safe, sane, consensual, and informed
KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity
“Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young
BDSM definitions for hurt and harm (as defined by Master Kuldrin)
Hurt: The intentional physical and/or psychological trials that are either self-inflicted or afflicted upon a typically masochistic person consensually participating in a BDSM scene for the purpose of physical, psychological, and/or sexual pleasure.
Harm: The intentional or unintentional physical and/or psychological trials that are either self-inflicted or afflicted upon a typically masochistic person consensually or nonconsensually participating in a BDSM scene that often has immediate and lasting psychological, and/or physical, and/or sexual negative effects.
A brief history of hurt and harm:
Flogging and self-flagellation go back thousands of years and was part of most, if not all civilization throughout history. There are cave paintings of people self-flagellating.
In the late 17th century, George Jeffreys of Welsh provenance, better known as “The Hanging Judge”, obviously earned his reputation but it extended beyond the gallows. Having sentenced a young woman to lashing at the rear of a cart, he advised the executor of the punishment, “Hangman, I charge you to pay particular attention to this lady! Scourge her soundly, man. Scourge her till her blood runs down! It is Christmas, a cold time for madam to strip in! See that you warm her shoulders thoroughly.”
It’s talked about in every monotheistic religion and most non monotheistic religions for both the purpose of punishment and enlightenment.
The U.S. Army abolished flogging on August 5th, 1861. However, direct corporal punishments were still used “off the books” into the mid 1900’s and nondirect corporal punishments such as running, pushups, and a plethora of other physical activities commonly referred to as exercise will forever be used in militaries around the world as an effective method for punishing, training, and psychologically strengthening soldiers.
Cathartic Flogging is a term coined by Master Skip Chasey wherein he defined it as "Merging the erotic with the ecstatic." It has been defined by Master Taino, the founder of MTTA and Executive Producer of Master/slave Conference as "A spiritual healing, that is erotic and sometimes a teleporting experience, created by the exchange of energy between the participants." He has also referred to it by saying it is "The exorcism of your demons."
Why is hurt good for us?
Hurt helps us to learn about ourselves
Think of the unnamed character play by Edward Norton in the movie “Fight Club”. He had never been in a fight and had no clue of his inner strengths but it was through the fighting that he learned just how strong of a person he was. It often does the same for us...only without the imaginary friend represented by Brad Pitt’s character, Tyler Durden.
Hurt helps us to experience life
It has been said that life isn’t about the destination but about the journey. For some, experiencing hurt is a foreign concept or a fantasy that is exciting and intriguing. For others, it is a scary thing...and that in itself can be erotic when you think about the primal instinct. Most people are very aware of the fight or flight instinct but what teachers forgot to teach us that there is more to it than just those two things. It actually fight, flight, freeze, feed, or fuck.
Another scene from “Fight Club” I love is when they are riding in the car and Edward Norton’s imaginary friend, Tyler talks him into taking his hands off the steering wheel....