Husbands and Wives––Christ and the Church, Part 2 (Eph 5:22–33) from South Woods Baptist Church on Vimeo.

There’s one big interpretive issue that concerns me as we read this passage. We certainly learn what a healthy, Christ-centered marriage should look like as we read through these verses and see the images and comparisons that are made. Loving, servant-hearted headship and warm, servant-hearted submission make sense when we see them in Christ and the church. In the divine design for marriage, we look at Christ and the church to learn about the husband and wife relationship. That part is clear.

But the problem comes when we reverse it by trying to understand Christ and the church by first looking at our marriages. That’s not the intention of this passage. For if we look at the flawed practices in a husband exercising headship and then relate that to Christ, we fail to see the real Jesus Christ who gave Himself for us. That’s why Paul uses the comparison “as” and “just as” four times in this passage, with each stating the responsibility in marriage “just as” we observe in Jesus and the church. So we don’t first start with marriage and then try to understand the gospel of Christ and its impact on the church. Instead, we understand marriage by first looking at Christ and the church.

That’s what we want to do in this study of our text. We want to take a look at how Paul explains the ways that Jesus has acted toward the church and how the church has responded to Him. From that foundation we begin to grapple with what marriage is to look like and how our roles in marriage portray Christ and the church. And in the process, we’ll better understand what it means to be the people that Jesus died for, sanctifies, and ultimately glorifies in His presence.

With an eternal love, Jesus Christ gave Himself for the church. What has Jesus done for the church? Let’s think about this by considering two major questions.

1. What does it mean for Jesus to love the church?

We toss the word “love” around without careful thought. ‘I love Thanksgiving Dinner!’ ‘I love my new jacket.’ ‘I love the cooler weather.’ While we know that the use of love regarding meals, clothes, and weather cannot compare to the love of Jesus for the church, the fact that we can use the term so commonly and so loosely may diminish how we understand the love of Jesus for the church. Because of that, reading about Jesus’ love may not grab and startle us, as it should. If I love a particular meal, then I don’t mean that I am giving myself in sacrificial abandon for turkey, dressing, and sweet potato pie. It just means that I find such foods delightful to my palate and satisfying to my desire for a full stomach.

So we reorient our thought and concept of love in order to grapple with Jesus’ love for the church. We’re talking about something far beyond an affinity for or delight in something that might be desirable and satisfying. The kind of love that Jesus showed certainly doesn’t lack in affinity for or delight in or affection for, but it’s much more. It’s a love that acts in sacrificial ways for the good of the object of that love. What does that love of Jesus for the church do?

(1) Giving of Himself in an act of substitution

How does one get across to the thickheaded skulls of men what it means to love their wives? We’re selfish creatures. We want what we want on our terms. We think nothing of trampling on others to get what we want. But love doesn’t exist in that kind of atmosphere—not the kind of love spoken concerning Christ or the kind of love that God designed for marriage. That’s why Paul starts with Jesus’ love to help husbands begin to work through what it means to love their wives. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her.” A comparison is used—“just as Christ also”—for us to attempt to fathom the love that’s to exist in marriage.

You notice that love is expressed in sacrificial language: Jesus “gave Himself u[...]