As I sit on my sofa or balcony, day after day, staring at the river Adur which goes up, and down, up and down, no matter what goes on in the world of men, one of the things I reflect on is that I got exactly what I wanted.

An empty diary.

If you’ve been around my newsletter or podcast for any length of time, you’ll know that, for years, my idea of freedom is an empty diary (and the income to enjoy it).

Well, with hindsight I now know that I needed to be much more specific. This is not the first time I’ve been gifted this lesson!

Because the LOA has a very odd way of delivering you exactly what you desire, but often throws in a few random and unexpected curveballs along the way.

If you are not a believer in the LOA yet, may I recommend a book “Synchronicity: The Inner Path Of Leadership” by Joseph Jaworski. If you are not convinced after reading that…well, it’s a great book, not woo-woo at all. It shows, not tells, how it all works on both a personal and quantum physics level, wrapped up in a rattling good personal story too.

So why, you may ask, do I now have an empty diary?

Because on the 29th of January 2026, after a week of tests and less than 24 hours before I was supposed to be getting on a business class flight to Thailand, ready to help host a 7-day Bullion Voyage luxury retreat with my mates Andy and Paul, I was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma (NHL for short).

Now, thank you in advance, but I don’t want any advice, tips or warnings; I’ve done my own research and due diligence and chosen my own path through this. Which I may or may not go into later in more detail, when I’m further along in my journey, not to mention being closer to knowing the outcome.

I digress.

Obviously, I suddenly had three long weeks on my hands, that I wasn’t going to be spending in Thailand, in 5-star luxury. That initial time flew past, as I got to grips with much research, implemented changes in lifestyle and habits, not to mention the relentless sleeplessness caused by long nights of bathroom visits of one kind or another (why always at night I wonder?).

My only diary appointments now were ad-hoc calls with my remaining two clients, various hospital visits and my regular 3pm Thursday afternoon appearances on Andy’s ‘Rational Thinking’ webinars.

I’d been feeling so ill for a couple of months, without knowing the cause, that at first, I was content to just take it easy and start to enjoy feeling relatively better as the more immediate effects of the NHL were addressed.

But I’m three and a half months in now and I realised the other day, I’m bored stiff.

After 35+ years of creating social media content, writing a weekly newsletter and working with thousands of clients via workshops, 1-2-1 coaching, and group programmes, I realise now that all of that - learning and delivering - fulfilled my Creator profile (in Roger Hamilton’s Wealth Dynamics terms).

Now that’s all come to an end, so where to get my creative kicks from? I’m learning watercolour painting but it’s only half hitting the spot somehow.

Worse, I feel invisible. Disappeared. That’s the Star profile part of me.

The podcasting, YouTube videos and speaking gigs had fulfilled that part nicely but most of that came to a halt in 2020 and the rest became increasingly impossible (and felt irrelevant) as the next six years unfolded.

I was talking to my friend Andy about this recently. He’s a prolific and inspirational writer himself, not to mention being a globally renowned mindset expert, so he’s a good bloke to talk to, about just about anything actually.

He encouraged me to start writing again. He used to read my first newsletter “Diary Of A Seaside Landlady” and loved it.

I’ve been thinking about it a lot and I’m seriously drawn to the idea of writing for it’s own sake. I’ve been journalling daily since January 18th 2010, but this is different, I’m writing both for my creative needs and for you, the reader, someone who loves to read like I do.

Not to build an audience again.

Not to attract clients again.

Just to fulfil my need to be creating something in the world, that wasn’t there before.

Just to keep a lifeline to the business world at large. Maybe get invited on a podcast or two?

Just to be able to share things I like and find useful myself.

Like this YouTube video and blog post by Dan Koe, which I shared with Andy, as part of our ongoing discussion about the future of AI for creatives.

Dan explained really well why, even if you don’t enjoy writing much, you need to do it for not only the sake of your own brain, but the sake of your potential readers who can tell when something is written by AI and who are already utterly fed up with it. We are swimming in endless social media marketing posts obviously written by poorly trained AI.

Dan suggested that the first step is to write out 20 topics that you could write about and I was easily able to come up with those.

From the deeply personal (growing up with a schizophrenic mother, losing a life partner suddenly, living in Greece, parenting two lively children into becoming whole young adults, a sudden life-threatening diagnosis) to the purely business (bootstrapped startups, content / attraction marketing, creativity, the resilience that comes from failing and succeeding in business over and over again, AI workflows, cashflow management, investing), I think I’ve got a deep well of experience and many topics to write about, as I feel so moved.

What I didn’t want was to be forced to write on a certain day, on certain topics only, to feel that the writing needs to lead to something.

I want to feel free to write about it all without worrying if what I write, or how I write it, will affect my business. Don’t laugh, someone once told me that she hesitated to sign up as a client because of my weekly blog posts / newsletter!

So for now, I think I’m simply going to follow my curiosity and write about whatever feels real, useful or interesting in the moment.

But I’d love your help shaping where this goes next.

Which topics would you most like me to explore further?

The business lessons?
The mindset side?
Creativity and writing?
AI and the future of human work?
Reinvention later in life?
Where to find amazing headscarfs, to cover a balding pate?
Investing?
Why I would’t start a business first nowadays?

Or the strange emotional side of suddenly stepping off the treadmill after decades of motion?

I’d love to hear from you in the comments below!

Warm regards
Nicola