Girl: “I have a boyfriend.....”

Man: “Wow....amazing...seriously, that’s amazing!”

Girl: “What? That I have a boyfriend?”

Man: “No, that I’ve barely known you for 5 minutes and you’re already telling me your problems.”

Girl: “l.m.a.o.!”

***

“Whoa, not so fast. We’re just talking here, ok? Don’t get the wrong idea.”

***

“You really thought I was hitting on you?”

***

“No worries. You’re not my type.”

***

“So does my girlfriend.”

***

Girl: “I have a boyfriend.”

Man: “Hey, my dog can juggle.”

Girl: “What?”

Man: “I’m sorry, I thought we were talking about shit that didn’t matter.”

***

“I don’t care.”

***

“That’s OK, I’m not the jealous type.”

***

“Your parents must be proud.” Same as above.

***

“Oh man, I’m so embarrassed. I thought you were a lesbian.”

***

“Are you allowed to talk to other men without his permission?”