I saw a girl todaytrying on an outfit for her first day of work.She looked so alive.

The kind of alive that only comeswhen everything feels like it might begin again.

And I remembered —there was a timewhen I felt that too.

When the unknown didn’t feel like a monster.It felt like a door.A possibility. A portal.The beginning of something I couldn’t wait to meet.

Back then, even a secondhand book salefelt like a place where my whole life might change.

But now…I hesitate.I brace.I overthink.I freeze.

I look at the future like a threat.Like it’s waiting to disappoint me.Like it’s something I have to survive — not something I get to step into.

I don’t know when that shift happened.But I miss the version of me who was still excitedto see what might unfold.

Maybe I’ll try putting on the outfitI wore to my first day of work.Maybe I’ll wear her energy for a while —and see if the spark remembers how to find me.

✧ quiet prompt:

What was the last new thing you looked forward to — not feared?

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit irisisquietly.substack.com